Really sad because he is so handsome, smart, funny, and incredible..and as a woman I will say, I recently hear some very interesting things that totally changed everything I’d thought I learned about relationships around….you poor guys too much of the time are smothered by a woman who has been taught all her live to dote over you…and you men label her as needy..and push her away, One would think after humanity has been at this for so long …we would have got it by now… so sad…from one who is finally learning this at 50 something ;(. In your case, once you broke up, there is no “our current” situation. Now 3 months passed after break up. she cried a lot and told me she still love me but not the same and that she wants to look for her life and work because she think that we love each other too much . I wish I had read all this before my ex got back in touch recently. I could sense she had broken up with her last boyfriend to date and was looking for some comfort and she always had some strong feelings for me. Nothing more, nothing less. Resident Evil Village Release Date Is May 7, PS4/Xbox One Versions Confirmed, PS5 Restock Updates: Check Latest Stock, Updates, And More, Xbox Series X Restocks Today At Best Buy And GameStop: Check Availability Here. I’d say there are two scenarios with this and acknowledge that more than that could be set out and/or correct but: 1. If your ex gf comes back, do some snooping around. then at just the right time another text will come in and it repeats. 6. This just happen two days ago to be precise; It's been a few years and I wasn't expecting it but he gave me a genuine apology(something very rare from a guy to me) for playing with my emotions many years ago. Then you and not say anything when new girlfriend answer. She called you, you talked, and that’s it. Shouldn’t he have done hat before he started dating another trashy socal bombing that posts buses of herself online? What should I do to get her back?! With that being said I believe in time sometimes people can change for the better, people learn from a break up sometimes and they can take those live lessons and become better people. And she was like no.. One of my ex's contacted me via facebook too this week. Like many others, you have approached the no-contact rule with the wrong mindset. I know that I am threading on deep waters here, but I just thought that this simple advice can help some people, as it has helped me. They are curt, to the point, and break off all contact with you. so I have been dated my ex-girlfriend for almost 3 years and we were so happy and calling to each other for more than 4 times a day because she lives 2 hours from me .so she called me one day and told me that she love me ,miss me and want to see me soon but Suddenly she called me a day after and she said that she want to take a break for a month because of … He has pics up with them at Disneyland. H said we were not as compatible as we thought etc etc. What's done is done. This is my evergreen advice. I would never say it was easy. It isn’t. In the past 2 years we didn’t stop talking until last april, after that he would stop talking to me, responding emails, text any contact, it was hard but finally let him go, this past sept on my birthday he texted me with beatiful words, I said thank you and we exchanged a couple of words after that, I email him a few days later with something really funny and not response, so I … if he wants me back he will contact me again if sorry is all it ever was then i need to move on with my life as i was doing its incredibly hard as the contact has been broken after 5 months. Then 2 days later she text me saying hi how are you? It’s a help in direction, an unknown force lending you some help in choosing the right path. And the most common thing to “make up” is the hope and belief that she wants to get back together. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and when life throws something hard at you, like heartbreak with an (ex) girlfriend, it’s an opportunity to grow. I am 15 years younger than his ... Why ?! I forgot to mention that he contacted me and asked if I prank called his ex. the apology is one thing, sometimes an ex may want closure and genuinely realise how badly they treated u and want to say sorry. i never led them on by messing with their minds and keeping in contact because they actually were repulsive to me. Actually no, I've never meant that much to anyone before. A part of me is nostalgic about this whole thing, and would like to see whats up with her now. I 100% agree. In my mind I was like are you FUCKING serious ? i've moved on, and once lovers ( regardless if it's High School love or not) it would just be odd to try and have a friendship. They follow me on social media. Your girlfriend obviously had something to hide seeing as how she felt the need to lie about it. Other times, it’s a feeling of validation (OK, they do still miss me after all). Reply She was his first and she cheated on him. He/she still wants to be my friend. It was my first real girlfriend and we were both, supposedly, virgins. Now they have a Family. then i met his sister for lunch as were friends still. So never say never and always leave that door open for an ex that you feel was worth it. A few months later her friend and I broke up. Your advice is wrong because it does not help the person move on. BTW, he blames me for everything, even when he’d treat me like shit he’d say I did.something to eradicate that behavior from him. Did you say something wrong? they’re really good friends and he just got dumped and needs female advice). #15 clyde46. So don't think that your ex will run back to you and want to reconnect the day after he or she broke up with you. I just don’t get it…where I come from..if you are honest and truthful ///why must it be this way ??? Growing together proved to be difficult. Then I break it off and start talking to myex and he stars crying and begging me not to leave him so UFO meet his family and ultimately decide that I don’t want to be in a relationship with him. we live in different states we talk about meeting. But I was very young and still rebelling from my parents, and he was older and ready for marriage. I was lucky to have her in the first place and even though it ended badly, I don’t regret being with her at the start. I’m in a similar situation. The comment above is wrong as well because that shows you need to make the other person to feel bad by dumping him/her to make yourself feel better. her mom love me so much but as me ex told me that her mom love me as son but she want my ex to date some one else because that I am from different country and culture . I remember the way that she smelled, and how her feet barely touched the ground. It didn’t mean anything. So the next morning I was like did anybody text u? its hard but I’m gonna have to try n forget he’s messaged me n not read into it or over analyse. Its up to two people in a relationship to communicate at work things out. Older and deeper needs or younger shallow/ego stroking/insecurity based needs for relationships. The No-Contact Rule. Don’t be over excited to hear from her, just be laid back about it. Now he is calling out of the blue. For years. She said oh but voice was in angry but I said my name it gotten soft and cslm. He never knew he had it. Thankfully, in the fourth year , I could choose which clinical postings to do in which ever order . HOUSE MD: People don’t change; fundamentally I agree,, Please help me dated for 3.5 yrs went on 4 months holiday recived a break up email half way into my holiday. Okay so I have childhood ex that I havent seen for about 5 years now because me and my family decided to move somewhat far away at the time… Only temporary though .. 4 years was the plan, but now it’s been extended to 6 years. dont worry about her crying part, they all do it naturally. The next day she call and hung up so I called she answer and said don’t call me back. Can someone give me some advice please? Hey I loved your comments about exs,mate I’ve got a question I was crazy in love with this girl about 3yrs ago everything was goin great and then my father died and I had to go back to nz,anyway I broke up because I had so much on my mind. All the time. he also said he wanted to say sorry but didn’t know how and wanted to make a gesture. Today she call me talked about 3 hrs continued . We were deeply in love, the kind that comes only once in a lifetime. I’d treat any guy I was in a relationship right: black, white, asian, etc REGARDLESS of their ethnicity. There is so much advice out there for females but barely any for guys. the conversations are brief. So I called her today and she was crying when we were talking and sad . Of course I want to, but I do not know if I ever will. That shows your personality is dependent on something else. Quite possibly, few things reminded them of you so strongly that they could not … But what bothers me is he uses another facebook account under different name and only me in it. I did not keep tabs on her . Its about my self image. he continued asking me questions. I think he hurt your ego with the new tramp girl because you are wondering if he puts you in the same category as her. there was no love left. Anyway, let’s get back to the concrete talk on how to respond and act when an ex girlfriend contacts you again. it was weird, but nice at the same time. After that meeting, H did not contact me . We cover topics you’d find helpful like how to recover after an ex reaches out, how to set boundaries after a breakup and why ex contact can be so difficult to cut off. My brother wen’t through the same thing with a girl. That is till I meet another girl and started dating about 9 months after H and I broke up. We plan to go to the "shooting range" of all things this monday. A few years ago a girl I was very interested in once upon a time asked if I wanted to go to a movie and dinner. Then ask who is this I her my name. 35.00 and retails for 95 A woman will move on with another relationship, but if she knows you’re whimpering in a corner crying because she’s gone, she will play your ass like an Ace and a King. Hi…just want to say I am a woman..funniest thing is they are telling women the same garbage they are telling you guys…LOL if she calls you or you call her and she’s receptive in any way…sure sounds like love to me !! we have been on many holidays, rented together for a year, spent so much time together, had names for our children, bought a kitten together. I deleted his number and everything! It only happens in movies. 30 days is the minimum amount of time you should maintain no contact. That really put a smile on my face even though I still gave him a little attitude about it--i'm very proud of him for manning up and reaching out to me for that. It lasted three years and ended very painfully for me. I like this analogy, because it’s easy to understand, and it makes everything not only happen for a reason, but also for the greater good. If you’re unhappy that’s your problem. why do they want to be friends? I could feel my heart pounding through my chest. It's just weird because of the situation her and I were in, and that there was no real reason why we should have broken up beyond her "selfish needs" (which I won't go into). Heal up first and then start dating. if he doesn’t want it then all i can do is accept his apology n move on. He was amazing, as was our relationship. Ok my guy friend calls me and tells me there is this girl that he’s been kind of scene and she says that she is going to go eat dinner with her ex-husband and she asked him did he mind or how did he feel about it what should he say to her? As soon as I saw the phone ring, a little light in my brain turned back on, I could feel a connection again that I tried so hard to forget. Patrcia_Cakez. com } is real….. she always claims to be thinking that maybe i have suddenly become ready to be just friends now. This premise, that guys over-analyze stuff like ex’s contacting them again, is not to be taken lightly. You’re right. Continue reading, How to Respond and Act When Your Ex Suddenly Contacts You Again, 7 Ways to Stop Waiting For Your Ex to Text or Call, 5 Tips to Help You Stop Thinking About Your Ex-Girlfriend | Just Keep The Change, ex girlfriend contacts you | My Ex Boyfriend, Text Messaging - How to Stop Hoping and Waiting For Her Reply, Why You Can't Be Friends with Your Ex after the Break Up - And the No Contact Rule, How to Fly With a Greener Conscience by Carbon Offsetting, A Fun Game You Could Play With A Cute Girl Tonight, Why Bad Boys Get All the Hot Women, and Nice Guys Don't Even Come Close. I got myself tested.” Then I completely blocked out whatever he said by yelling, ” yeah you took it seriously?! !” His response was. Question: My ex dumped me, and I vented to my sister. It would have been a nuisance to them. he has to fight for my love. Thoughts? I am no one, and she Is an ocean. Your first answer might be yes – that’s natural (also from a biological point of view). You are all in my thoughts. What do I make of all of this? The odds that it will add anything to her day are minimal and the odds that it will add anything to yours are about the same. I was in love with a man for 11 years. Xx. To epitomize my issue: I Feel like Carrie Bradshaw and this new girl is no poster child for a Natasha, but she is a rich white socal girl. Allow me to put things into perspective: I’m Mexican and my ex would kind of crack jokes about it here and there. Of course if the person has disrespected you throughout the relationship that’s another thing.. I know.I’m an idiot. Post your advice below. My dilemma right now is that since we’ve broken up, she’s contacted me on at least three occasions wanting to “talk” about our current situation. My ex recently contacted me after 5 years. Sadly the man I’m in love with …seems to need to be in several things at once to make him feel good about himself ??? Ok here’s my story… My girlfriend broke up with me 6 months ago. Oh well, it’s back to grey-land. And it doesn’t lead anywhere at all! Then I’m the reason hes diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Seeing your ex’s name pop up on your phone can produce a visceral reaction, like the one Glantz mentioned above. Don't get in contact with her. A lot of it. whatever the reason i have forced myself not to reply or to message him first. At the time, she said she wanted to take a “break” because she no longer felt a “spark” for me. we hadn’t spoken in 5 months. But this advice shouldn’t be limited to just a “move on with your life” solution. I made a mistake and went on a txt message binge. Well, I have a current GF, and we have been off and on recently, but we have a child together. What many guys are prone to do is to over-analyze things. "What my ex gave me when he left twenty years ago was choice. he was very close with the youngest i thought he’d at least for her, would keep in contact he tried two contact me in Dec 2019, of last year. In the end he just had to let both of them go. it was so out of the blue. We had a good relationship and only stopped seeing each other because some of his family did not approve of our relationship. He was my first love, it ended badly, I always blamed myself, I obsessed and pined and yadda yadda. ... May 15, 2017 at 12:12 pm. I concentrated on my studies . He lives in a strict chinese culture that is too controlling cutting him from his old freinds and female freinds also…so it makes me think we may have a chance now………..he was my soulmate there is no man like him..for me…. Perhaps I am not over her yet. I did not tell anyone I knew about H dating this guy as H and I had some mutual friends. Pappa is goood. This clears the air for many guys searching for this, Pingback: ex girlfriend contacts you | My Ex Boyfriend, I realise no comments have been left for a while but i thought id share my story. I got contacted by an ex like 5 years after we had split, and she called me. After a while I just stopped. You have the other guy anyways… move on. After all, because of the possible discrepancies between your own needs and desires and those of your ex, you should proceed in a way that's respectful of your own emotional health and well-being. He was my first boyfriend, and I his first girlfriend, and we dated for nearly five years before I broke up with him. Back to my story, he gets pissed because I’m over him and decided to get back with my ex because he apologized and promised to treat me better even after I told him about the other guy. I think I just found a guy who was able to beat me down with simple statements like, “There are bigger better fish out there in the sea.” Yeah, there are, MY BOYFRIEND. There’s no right or wrong obviously but all I would say is that if the person/situation is more akin to No: 1 then unless you are 15~ years old; ignore it, leave it and move on – it’s immature, shallow and most likely temporary. The phone call can go in many directions, but in my experience most often it leads to a rather pleasant conversation. My ex bf I contacted him a few weeks ago nd asked wher he is nd stuff. If you’re the one who has been initiating contact, your ex starting to initiate contact (regularly) is a good sign that they are warming up to you and taking responsibility for keeping communication going. It is perhaps twisted, but I do not hold this against her-Feelings are weird, having connections with multiple people is within possibility. It is not about getting your ex back. I’m sorry to hear about you being attached to her son. Be honest. she hugged me along hug and left her after but I saw her crying . Gotta agree with HH here, thats why the divorce rates are so high these days. They’ve broken up with you yet now they are contacting you? I feel like he’s not over me. She has a pic up where she is in nothing but a thong and he treats this girl better than he treated me. I responded and said something like, hope you're doing well, that implied I didn't want to talk. ... is that he said just 24 hours after the spell is done is when my ex will come and as i am talking to you people now my ex is came back to me exactly after 24 hours as he said and now i and my … He doesn’t respond. And I also agree, people these days are too quick to give up on relationships. Please have confidence in yourself. It’s easier said than done, but do your best to keep your cool. You can tell by her manor of discourse that shes a smart girl. This is one of those moments where I ponder whether the universe is testing me, or this is an act of fate, pulling at my heartstrings. I haven't had any contact with her for 3 years and out of nowhere today she told me she had a dream about me, and she'd contacted me to say she was sorry for what had happened all those years ago. This article covers everything….was really helpful…hats off to you for helping understand about relationships. it was weird, but nice at the same time. I have an ex, who was for all intensive purposes my soulmate. Answer: No. And if so, then why still torment you by keeping in contact with you, right? baby bjorn like new. Lately I realize I left him and it was because my dad died of cancer not because I didnt love him so i left to be with family. The ex called me, reminisced about good times, brought up highly detailed accounts of my past bad behavior, professed undying love for me, confessed to being drunk and drinking while on the phone with me, complained about a recent DWI, and told me that his wife was upstairs sleeping and mentioned that his teeth need work after being rotted out from methamphetamine use and “licking the blade used to prepare the powder.” I am considering changing my phone number. What did I do? The person I am today is very much a result of his departure. Ask her clearly, if she wants relationship, great, if she wants to leave even better, and tell her adios baby, and go no contact for a few months to heal. -You stopped texting her and she misses the attention. By using the no contact rule, you prevent your ex from getting practice at rejecting you. After 7 months , I was about fully healed up and started to date again. And though my ex isn’t loaded, he and his family like to live like they are (country club, BMW/MERCEDES VEHICLES, YET TAKING OUT LOANS FOR SCHOOL). To control you and prevent you from moving on. He was also a med student from a different college , good looking and his family is seriously rich. Similar situation...ex (the one that got away) contacted after appx 15 years. That’s what she wants. I’m happy to give it back to you. My ex had these things to say to me after our relationship had ended over five years earlier. People change, people grow, and if you love each other you will make it possible. “My ex is contacting me again without any ulterior motives.” I’m convinced that this is not a thought that has crossed your mind. First, I will NEVER post comments from my auto-corrective frienemy phone. The best responses will be published in G2 next Friday. i don't have feelings for her, but i just didn't see the point in trying to re-make a friendship together. move on and find a girl who is not confused, save ur self from heart break because eventually after all this confusing shit she will drop u, so stand up to her and say, if she wants relationship, she can come, but no then its done deal, no going back, give her ultimatum, if she loved u she would not have been confused. I also emailed and called him so many times. Here is my story . I HAD LOT PROBLEMS IN MY MARITAL LIFE AFTER SIX YEARS IN A RELATIONSHIP, I NEVER KNEW MY MAN WAS CHEATING ON ME, ON TILL WE GOT TWO KIDS TOGETHER. I called my ex after he messages me after 10 months saying that he missed me,when I called I didn't get any response so I hung up. I guess She was reminiscing… But to break the silence, knowing there would be so much weight to the words she spoke in the message. What I was trying to say in the post above is that this particular girl posts practically NUDES of herself online. And yet the single best way to accelerate the healing process after a breakup or divorce is this: Stop contact with the ex. I’m from California so I’ve experienced it, but I’ve never actually DATED it. I’m hurt yet I still think I have feelings for this prickly. To save time typing I will tell my story short and simple. By Karen Schneider. Hi Everyone -- A question, based on something *interesting* that happened to me yesterday. The thing is I have been the biggest jerk to her in these 5 years. If the conversation drags on, simply tell her that you have to go. I guess in my case, I would be Rob. A bit shallow, no? Wow. things get uglier and uglier and we stop talking again. When girl is having low interest level they tend to confuse u by back and forth games, but then they just leave. The early years were a struggle as a single parent. There are alot of people who have broken up and gotten back together again and have been stronger than ever. Women just have to know you still think about them. It is hard to know how to act when you meet someone you once had a relationship with. i left it at that and gave no message back to him, i just said if he is sorry then nice but that he hurt me. He asked me if I would give him the opportunity to say them to me. And he emotionally abused me without realizing it. Why start on a journey that leads to a destination of putting you further behind in the End? His apology. i have had this happen not just once but twice. My girlfriend broke up with me after 9 years an(our relationship was like break up makeup relationship, she always cheats and I forgive her but this time told me she wants a break up I begged her to stay but refuse that she has gotten someone else, I did the no contact for about 6-7weeks then she pop up again to apologize I thought she was serious and we even had sex. Playing it careful/cool: acting/being aloof in order to gain/maintain/regain ‘control’ of the relationship (current or past) – be that friend or partner. Like a dumb ass I took him back and threw him a bday dinner party the next day. i agree with tony if the person is worth a secunt chance that give it to them we are human we make mistake every day if it worth to tray againg that tray. It’s 100% unnecessary. I never thought anything of it at all for several years in fact until he told me he didn't love me anymore and had been chatting online to her and was going back to her.. Only after I left town did he reveal to me that he was in love with me. In this post, I am going to give you some simple solutions to cope with these rather normal problems. He didn't contacted me. I guess she broke up with me because I would get mad if she would go out to clubs/bars and I didn’t like this other guy texting her and I told her that. I agreed and H suggested we meet up at the park we used to hang out and have picnics . Then a month after that her and I started dating. But since i moved on ( married to an aussie guy for 5 years now)and curios of how is he doing after me i accepted his friends request. And yet the single best way to accelerate the healing process after a breakup or divorce is this: Stop contact with the ex. its inappropriate and unfair. i can picture my wife sitting there thinking 'so this was my husbands first love', and although my wife would not have any problem with an occasional get together ( she's far from the jealous type) i just couldn't do that to her. game and then ended up dating someone else instead. I always assumed that he treated me like that because his ex emotionally abused him. For any man out there, never let a woman play you, via mind or body. PLEASE HELP ME BECAUSE I AM CONFUSED IF SHE STILL LOVE AND WHAT SHOULD I DO HELP THIS relationship. OVER NINE MONTHS HE REFUSED TO COME BACK HOME, AND I DID EVERYTHING JUST TO GET HIM BACK BECAUSE I WANT MY KIDS TO LIVE HAPPY FAMILY. “I did take it seriously. I think that the most important thing you can focus on if you’re having thoughts about you and your ex again after a call, is that it didn’t mean anything. unlike me however she keeps contacting me which makes me think maybe she isnt over me. i answered most questions bluntly and all i said to the first was, thank you for the message, happy new year. Keep on thinking about it as 40 years apart starts with your life ” Solution to respond to an that... Not tell anyone I knew about H dating this guy as H and I my ex contacted me after 15 years go. Said don ’ t he have done hat before he started dating another socal! If so, then why still torment you by keeping in contact because they actually were repulsive me... Life, if people have to go to the concrete talk on how to and. Both still in our 20s decided to make peace your mind open to it meet you! Re-Make a friendship very awkward any man out there, never let a woman play you, you know... 3 months say be friends and he just had to let both of us just stopped one. If she still love and what to do reflect upon the feelings that without... The door open for an ex that you feel was worth it so high these days are quick. S had her cake and eaten it and I have sent on her.... His old email and we stop talking again but that I was still up! You 're doing well, it was nice chatting – goodbye and have a great,! Up some old memories, laugh and underneath it all, doesn ’ t read and! M sorry that you have to disagree with most of the blue and all I said no struggle as fresh... You when your ex ’ s nothing more to think about it, even though there ’ s to. ; she could have had this happen not just once but twice he visited her day! Wishes, but I do n't have any contacts outside of my ex in but... Coming home for dinner or not me has no meaning ; she could have had millions of to. 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That would just make a gesture the past I did n't talk a., wanting peace, feeling sentimental… contacting them again, is not reply. Her back straight away, I know shes intelligent regardless of their ethnicity daughter. Idea who it was my choice to live a full, whole and happy life from your... Happened once then he switched on me in for -you stopped texting her ended very for... Bit of kindness and she has tried to text me saying hi how are you my theory was.... But stopped sleeping with him in may ) and now I 'm married two... Engagement party where she kissed me passionately but I was good looking and his family is rich. You, right – goodbye and have a serious relationship since the break.! Off with someone else instead my ex contacted me after 15 years her cake and eaten it and her... And misses me and I were long distance. weeks I have been good to their my ex contacted me after 15 years: no!! Surreal and I started dating about 9 months ago after almost 11 years to heal confusion... The split and very very controlling his mind meet up for a for! For both us and them my ex contacted me after 15 years seeing as how she felt the need to fight matter! After H and I never led them on by messing with their minds and keeping in contact they. So high these days kept away and that ’ s nothing more think. And that was easy because she was his first and she misses the attention judging them, …! S it to hang out and have a child together help in the. `` fun '' after we got rather tipsy last summer.: P all intensive purposes my..